New Year Resolutions

Why do it to ourselves? Why not? There is something kind of wonderful about thinking of all the things we want to do, to achieve. There is also something kind of awful about listing them and then feeling the pressure of near inevitable failure. At least all of these are feelings. Feelings are a great way of knowing you are still alive, that you are human.

Past attempts

I have had some great ones over the years and I might just add them back into this year.

• Buy four bottles of champagne per month and consume one of them whilst having a bath.

Maybe you shouldn’t listen to this one for health and safety reasons. I was younger at the time and it felt decadent. I achieved it for a whole year. Moet was my tipple at that point. I think my champagne tastes have increased in cost. Thank god for the Prosecco being reasonably priced and a preference for a good red.

• Don’t use the cooker until at least March

Maybe you shouldn’t listen to this one for nutritional purposes. No it wasn’t the same year as the champagne.

I tend to get to mid way through February as I have a tiny kitchen that I am not sure has much purpose. Apparently others think so too. I got Christmas text from the chancer. It was rambling – how he saw me and knew I was the one for him, how he knows I have to live my life and not be too tied down and blah blah blah. No mention of the fact that I told him I wasn’t interested and, given the fact he never turns up, this was unlikely to change. I was already snorting with laughter when the second text came in rapid succession. It read “your kitchen has always bothered me tho”. That had me rolling around. Mainly because it, and he, has never bothered me.

• There have always been the gym ones, the healthy ones, the weight ones, the muscle ones.

A new list for the new year

Possibly. If I must. Here it is with the caveat that it is open to failure, success and adaptation.

• Buy a new dress every month. Don’t buy new heels every month (I have enough of them).
• Try not to use the cooker until at least March.
• Always have painted toe nails (colour can vary).
• Do a proper handstand. Not a kick up one…a graceful (this will change) lift up yoga one using my core.
• Work on my core.
• Stop finding chancers highly amusing.
• Build a little bit of muscle. Nice muscles, yoga ish type muscles.
• Lose any jiggly bits to show the muscle (I’ve never been skinny but I should avoid being overly curvy).
• Hope that with another year my boobs stay fabulous and don’t drop to my knees.
• Do a lot of chest presses on a raised bench to avoid the above.
• Have fun and laugh every day even if things are sometimes rubbish.

That was longer than I though it would be. This is the problem with lists. Apart from the fact I don’t like them they can go on for ever! I also seem to have fitness back in there. My list looks a little superficial. Possibly. I don’t mind though. I think the important things in life shouldn’t necessarily be the ones we make up for our New Years resolutions.

Disclaimer – I don’t promise to achieve any of the above….but I might have a little fun whilst trying. What are yours?

Photo by Jude Beck on Unsplash